A Moment With Pastor Fred

I well remember Stevie Foster. I feared him. He was the neighborhood bully. His name brought terror to my soul. I was 5. Stevie was probably 8. 

But today bullying isn’t childish as it was with Stevie. Yes, he was mean. Yes, he punched me, but bullying is vicious and cruel. Students are bullied for all sorts of reasons – their intelligence, looks or lack of looks, absence of athletic ability – the list goes on and on. Our culture has taken a hard stance against bullying and rightly so. Name calling and physical violence are not only wrong but unchristian. We need to instill in our children the call to stand up for the oppressed. 

Bullying also exists in the home. Tragically husbands or  fathers can be bullies – even Christian men. It can be either physical or verbal – regardless, its sinful and grieves the Holy Spirit. Verbal abuse is a terrible sin which churches tend to overlook. Darby Strickland writes, “Oppression in marriage [is] a pattern of coercive, controlling and punishing behaviors whereby one spouse seeks to control and dominate the other.” Tactics used vary: preventing personal freedom, fear, humiliation, threats, etc. Such abuse is never appropriate. Biblical counselor Ed Welch writes, “[We] err in understanding how difficult it is to live with an angry spouse.”

O dear brothers, let us as men commit to loving our wives and children well. Let us not succumb to our sinful and selfish natures by taking advantage of those under our care. “Let the words of our mouth be acceptable in your sight, O Lord.”